I took myself off to the January sales to buy some household essentials, sheets, towels etc.. came home with a nice new pair of jeans for me instead.
I never even made it to the household department in Arnotts. Those clever department store sales people types… They shamelessly make sure you have to bypass The Shoe Garden, Mango, Orla Keily, Zara before you get to the towels.. what kind of brain illness would make anyone want to buy towels over new shoes, or new jeans in my case.
So I guess we’ll have to put up with the grey washed out scratchy old towels until next January. We are not what you would call a ‘house proud’ family. No, I doubt anyone will object to the poor quality of the towels. The next time I’ll buy one little cute guest towel for the visitors toilet downstairs and tell the boys not to use it, it’s just for show.
Back to jeans. The bewildering range on offer can be almost offputting (I said almost). Boyfriend, bootcut, skinny…. My mistake was thinking I’d look good in skinny… there is nothing skinny about me so why would I think I’d suit skinny jeans. I tried them on. Do you remember how cartoons had robbers with bags of loot. Think of the loot bag.. well that’s what my arse looked like. Lumpy and bumpy. Well, I’m no longer 20 something, so I refuse to get upset or let that interfere with my quest.
I did find a pair which promise to keep you in in all the right places. I don’t even have to lie on the bed and pull up the zip with a coat hanger which is always a plus. High waist, high bum.. So now I’m wearing more elastic than a ping pong ball. If you ping me at the back I’ll fly off to Vladivistok in a second.